Sunday, May 20, 2007

Masochism, Madonna and Diet Root Beer/

So now that I've discovered mini-posts, I am a much happier, much less productive person. If given the choice between writing...oh...I don't know...a PLAY, or writing a little itsy bitsy new post (a postlet, if you will) I can't help but choose the postlet.

Today's post is about nothing; however, I can't admit that, so let's just say that it's about root beer. Root beer is disgusting. It always seems to be flat, no matter how recently it was opened. It generally has a picture of some creepy and unidentifiable animal on the front; it looks misleadingly similar to Coke, which makes for a lot of nasty surprises at children's birthday parties; you can't mix it with alcohol (well you could, but it would be a waste of good alcohol); it often doesn't have caffeine in it, so it offers little to no mood-altering benefits...and it tastes like soap. So why, ladies and gentleman...why am I addicted to DIET ROOT BEER? This is a mystery to me. Asspartame (I spelled it like that on purpose) is terrifying and is bound to contribute to the extinction of the human race. It also tastes like a cleaning product, so why when it is used to make the diet version of the only pop I don't like (excluding Dr. Pepper, which is an eternal mystery to me)...do I spend ten dollars a week on the stuff? Somehow, something about it just works. (Kind of like ketchup rice cakes. WHOLE other post(let).)

Now, onto other forms of masochism...

I just went to the gym and did a class called "Boot Camp". It didn't feel anything like camp, and not one person was wearing anything resembling boots. My legs hurt. My face looks like a swollen beet. I'm bruised. And beaten down. AND I FEEL FANTASTIC. WOW. I'm gonna do that again tomorrow. Loved every miserable minute of it.

Also...keep voting for David for Best Geek Blog! And I have to just be shameless here for a second and say that if I get three more votes for best celebrity blog, I will be ahead of Madonna. Yes, THE Madonna. (Not the holy one -- the other one.) I know it won't last, but it would be pretty cool to beat Madonna at something. She's MADONNA, for god's sake.

Okay bye. I'm going to ice my glutes now.

K.

26 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

love the post(let).
I happen to like rootbeer, well Thomas Kemper rootbeer anyway.
Oh, and I voted for David!
Have a great day!
Caryn

2:13 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

And, why do they call it root beer? Is it made from roots? 'Cause it does have the prevalent dash of dirt flavor present in root vegetables.

:-P

A&W Rootbeer fan.

2:44 PM  
Blogger ames said...

Root beer is of the devil. However, hoarhound candy, which is essentially root beer in candy form, is fantastic. The mysteries of the universe will never cease to amaze me.

I did a boot camp once, ran by an ex-Marine named Nicole who was all of 5'3". It kicked my ass, and I loved it. Have fun!

2:46 PM  
Blogger salivia_baker said...

never drank root beer but I think it's like when I drink normal beer (and it is the "good" german one). I mean I hate drinkingbeer but from time to time I just have todrink one just to know again why I hate it...
Or maybe you're like Date "it tasts.." "..awful?" "yes! that's it, It's awful, I hate it" "more?" "yes, please"

boot camp.. I walsways though only boots are allowed there not the owners.. silly world.
anyway I know the feeling, it's like an outing! One day you discover you actually like(!) sport.. this is sick.. but I have found also a cure to that: lazyness . So you can keep a balance and not drifting to the darksite and become a sports(wo)man.

@darklock
jup, it was made of an extract you get from roots. It was only not taht healthy (poisen!) so now you use fake it.

3:30 PM  
Blogger Adm.Polli said...

Because now you write so often, you put me a little bit under stress!
Now I have to try more often to think in English and write English.
But probably that's it, what I wanted (if you remember my first mail).

In Germany we don't have Root Beer.

What do think Germans drink the whole blessed day? :o)

Love,
Stefan

3:31 PM  
Blogger WizPip said...

Hmm... I haven't tried root beer before either. I wonder where I can get it in the Good ole UK of ... hmm, not enough letters.

3:38 PM  
Blogger lizzy said...

I haven't been to "Boot Camp" in three weeks and yet as soon as I read it my calves started to ache... I feel your pain.

3:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why do women love those stupid workouts? It's mindless, its boring as hell (i once got crazy and tried), it's in no way fun. And you cannot win!
That's the real question, not why you got addicted to root beer. Make a blog out of that!

3:54 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Ketchup rice cakes?! We don't have ketchup flavored anything here in the US. :( Canada gets all the good stuff.

5:58 PM  
Blogger [J]oe said...

Although i've never, nor would i want to drink root beer, i tend to find in England it's not undefinable species on the bottle, but hillariously dirty farmer type men on it. Feel lucky you have animals and crap beer rather than scary men and crap beer!

And well of course you're better than Madonna; she doesn't have post(let)s!

Loves x

[J]oe

6:15 PM  
Blogger Jessie said...

Oh, sweetie. I love Dr. Pepper and root beer (though, not the stuff sold at Cracker Barrel, just no). I especially love Dr. Pepper, well, diet with vanilla nowadays. I had some earlier today, actually. Root beer is awesome, though I only like Barq's. A&W tastes nasty. Barq's in the middle of a hot summer day. Goodness knows, you sweat it right out down here.

And boot camp? Pfft, I don't even go pretend to be doing exercises, like the treadmill. I don't like people yelling at me. Tend to yell back, and they're not fond of that.

6:19 PM  
Blogger Misty aka s_aurius said...

It's interesting, the only rootbeer I really like is an energy drink flavored one. :p Maybe it's all the extra caffiene?

Boot camp. I've enlisted in the army so I'll be getting to participate in that fun time in a few months! :D

6:39 PM  
Blogger dead-blog said...

Root beer is... odd. lol. I don't mind it, but I'd rather a Sprite or even better - orange juice. Good ol' OJ.

Also, for what it's worth, you're far more interesting than Madonna, and I'd rather read your blog than hers.

Loving the post(let)s!
Take care of yourself, dahling,
Ayla McKay
Nova Scotia

8:52 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

My body aches in sympathy - but boot camp workouts do seem to work to get into shape.

I generally just run, although my cat thinks I'm a salt lick when I get back and is way too affectionate around my sneakers (loves to sniff and knead them) than I think is healthy.

A little sibling rivalry here?

9:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cherry juice can reduce muscle pain and damage induced by exercise

11:59 PM  
Blogger Neep said...

I love the only root beer I can get hold of in NZ, but I have been told that it isn't *real* root beer. Sigh.

Have you tried half Guinness, half tequila? Awesome hangover cure, so it might be a good workout cure too.

You need to get hold of V, a New Zealand energy drink.

12:57 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

I've got an ungodly affection for Coke Zero. *shakes head* I know, I know.

2:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It tastes like TCP and vinegar - which should stop anyone from drinking it, but we all do...

My fool-proof plan for getting fit is giving myself 5 minutes to get to the train that's a 10 minute walk away - after a week of it, I wouldn't recommend it to anyone.

2:40 AM  
Blogger crazymom said...

Half Guinness, half tequila?? Does it really cure a hangover or just make you not care that you have one?

3:37 AM  
Blogger Cygnet said...

Man, I can't believe the hatin on the root beer! Nectar of the Gods, I tell ya. But hey, here is something that might make you like the poor RB a little more.

Take a glass of root beer and add some vanilla vodka to it. Now that's tasty. It's like a root beer float that makes you float if you drink enough of it. ;)

12:28 PM  
Blogger kholmes said...

I love root beer! But only Diet A&W. That stuff is amazing.

3:42 PM  
Blogger Becky L said...

How strange. I happen to be on a root beer kick right now. I think because it's spring. Brings out the thoughts of root beer floats and such. Oh, and a local bar does make an alcoholic drink using root beer. I'm told it tastes like root beer but gives you a very nice 'high'. Don't know if they have tried using diet root beer with it though. If I can find out what they use, I'll share the ingredients.

4:38 PM  
Blogger Francy said...

What IS root beer, anyways? What is it called here in Italy, I wonder? I should try it, I guess, just for the sake of experience, but I'm kinda worried... *LOL*

"Boot camp"? What did they make you do?

2:46 AM  
Blogger Jen, heart traveler said...

I absolutely hate root beer, it's just gross. Personally, those damn cans look like regular beer cans. I'll bet there are stories to tell about "junior" getting drunk on accident.

As for the workouts, I love the ones that kick my butt. However, my best friend recently broke a rib during a training session, because she overdid it. She and her trainer must be nuts, because after the diagnosis...she went back to the gym! She must be doing something right though, she's lost 30 lbs. X|

And I voted for you and David. Win it!!

2:51 AM  
Blogger watcher652 said...

There are many different brands of root beer, as with any soda. Maybe you've just been drinking the yucky ones. Personally, among the major brands, I love A&W, Hires is ok, Mugs is watery, and Barq's awful. A&W root beer and Breyer's all natural vanillia ice cream make for the best root beer float.

I've already voted for you, so I can't up your count. Voters have to register with their email address so they can't vote more than once per person per category. Or more than the number of email addresses you have that you can use to register with (wink, wink). Beating Madonna would be so cool.

3:35 AM  
Anonymous rashid1891 said...

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is a very good picture
sajid

7:32 AM  

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